Five Limericks

National Limerick Day

(12/5/98)

A poet of little distinction

Tried to save rhyming verse from extinction.

Though Lear was his model

He wrote only twaddle

Since lacking the master’s instinction.

 

There once was a girl called Camilla

Who went on Blind Date with Our Cilla.

The picker refused her

(which did not amuse her.)

He’d much rather date a gorilla!

 

A lady we know as Estelle *

Said “I haven’t done very well,

So, rather than stay,

I’ll resign, if I may.

Say, “She wasn’t pushed-she just fell.”

 

No gentleman he is, Saddam,

For saying I don’t give a damn

If the US planes fly

And my citizens fry.

I’ll just carry on as I am.”

 

The Peace Process came to Belfast

But we all knew it couldn’t last.

A spy by appointment

The fly in the ointment

And the Peace Process fell on its ast.

 

*A politician whose surname I have forgotten

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